Tuesday, 26 June 2012

Makes me that much stronger, makes me work a little bit harder, makes me that much wiser , so thanks for making me a fighter. Makes me learn a little bit faster, makes my skin a little bit thicker, makes me that much smarted, so thanks for making me a fighter...

Good old Christina Aguilera, great strong woman there in her own right, I find surrounding myself with good strong, positive woman a definite way to improve my life, surrounding myself with people who believe in me and don't put me down and make me feel shit about who I am, and what I stand for!
It has been a long hard rocky road over well the last 19 years, but I can finally sit here at my pink sony lap top and say that I am one of these great, strong independant woman! I can say this without worrying that people may think I'm arrogont or big headed, I'm done with always having to be modest, being British and especially being a woman we've been brought up to put ourselves down and we shouldn't talk about our acheivments because it's classed as "showing off" well I'm finally understanding that although I'm proud to be British, I'm also proud to be a woman and I'm proud of my achievments, what I've lived through, and what I've survived and I now know no-one has the right to judge me apart from God and he is the one person that won't judge me!

So today I passed my first year of beauty school the one and only thing I've been wanting to do for years, but due to funds and pressure I hadn't manage to do it till the 2011, and now I've done half of my level 2 and after having all my exams and assesments signed off today, I had this feeling of acheivment and it is such a nice feeling I can't even tell you how proud I am of myself, sticking at it even when things were tough, and I think despite all the put downs and the shit I've had to deal with and the complete lack of support from my father who has never not once in my life ever told me that he's proud of me, or that he loves me!
I figure all of this together has made me so determinded to acheive the one thing I know I can do and have always wanted to do despite everything.

10 years down the line, when I'm well who knows but hopefully happy and successful (what I would class as successful not neceseraly what other people define as success), I will not let my father take a single credit for any of it!
The only person who really can take the credit for the person I have become is my mother who has stuck by me, through my whole life, and I can assure you I wasn't an easy teenager, and letting me live with her, and times are sometimes tough but she's supported me the whole way and I hope one day when I have a daughter she feels as much love from me as I do right now from my mum!

I'm going to finish on that note for now.
I would like to thank the people who have supported me and loved me through the hard times and the good, no need to list names, you know who you are!

Finally I've just started reading "The Memoirs of Cleopatra" strong woman, definitly something worth getting my teeth sunk into!

Peace out and love to the world!

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