Thursday, 16 June 2011

Who will save your soul?

Well who knows who will save these hideous humans who call themselves men, they're beyond help! Who saved Diesels soul? Well his soul will be saved because he wasn't a bad person deep down. I guess even he was a hypacrit at times, but hey aren't we all and I won't slag off the dead, tell you what though its so much easier to remember things differently when someones past on. However its time to leave him and that to rest now. Consistantly digging up the past isn't good for my mental health!!
Had lunch with Chris's step dad today and hung out (I know what your thinking). He isn't anything like Chris though. To be honest it was actually nice to be able to hang out and have real conversations with someone that doesn't have a mental age and a volcablary of a 5 year old! Feel optimistic actually.
Been speaking to Lauren alot recently and she just has brilliant karma that seems to heal me and make me feel determined and stronger mentally! It's great when someone really understands and really believes in you, not many people do believe in me! I only need one person to believe and it makes me feel so empowered and calmer!
Officially need to ring my publisher tomorrow, no exscuses.
Went to the clinic today after being completly paranoid that I have an STD. Well I don't have thrush (which isn't an STD any how) and I don't have Gohnarea, obvioulsy with chlymidia and the others I have to wait. Had the HIV and hep tests too and they come back in 2-3 weeks so fingers crossed I'm all clear!
The counsil are proper on it to find me a flat I've been homeless one day and they already found me a flat to move into (am not taking it as there was severe mould and in Hove, well we all know I can't live in Hove). The point is in one day of being homeless they found me somewhere so by the end of the 4 weeks I'm sure I will have a flat. They ain't putting me in a hostel or a B&B which is definitly a good thing!
Woop woop off on holiday for a week tomo, just what I need really a nice relaxing break! Jennets a legend so will be good to see her and catch up properly and maybe even learn a few of the secrets of how to make the most amazing cakes like EVER!!!!
Even Beccas been neing nice to me begining to wonder if there's something up but maybe she's just trying to be supportive after knowing about my attempted suicide a couple weeks ago and my relapse on drinking.
10 days now without a fag :(. I think I 've got about 3 days left of antibiotics now and then hopefully I can actually smoke again!
Anyhow going out with Emily on 30th soooo getting her in a dress, we're going to go out and pull woman, I am through with men they suck so maybe I'll date woman again for a bit, afterall I expect guys to go down on me so how bad can it be to go down on a girl??
Meh thats it for me. Much more optimistic though arn't I! Homeless or not, I'm going to be the classiest homeless gal like ever! Oh and one more thing I am always fucking fabulous whether I'm homeless or not, no matter what you want to say about me, don't you go forgetting that!!!

Peace out
love to all me followers
as the rest of you........................


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